“No, father, you never did care about anything except your precious job.”
This is a line from Blood and Iron, spoken by a young woman to her father, and overheard by a nearby robot. Given the circumstances in which the words were spoken, I originally used an expletive in place of precious. But then I realised that as the words were being translated by computer as the young woman spoke them, and robots don’t use human expletives which tend be organically based, the sentence would probably read
“No, father, you never did care about anything except your rusting job.”
This is logical, but it wouldn’t make a lot of sense to the reader at first glance as it doesn’t sound like the sort of thing a young woman could say. I could have put in an explanation (a common writers’ mistake, in my opinion), but that would have slowed down the action, and worse, taken the reader away from the scene and reminded them they were reading a book.
I love a complicated plot, I love hard SF, but when it comes to the writing I always like to Keep It Simple, Stupid.
Anyway, Blood and Iron is finished and should be with Macmillan now.